A letter to the Lady Aeducan
by Sabela Stone
Summary: What if Gorim after meeting Serada in the market square of Denerim had written a letter to her? Would his lady love read it?


**A letter to the Lady Aeducan.**

*****Gorim*****

Gorim sat at the table looking at the parchment before him. His mind wandered back to this afternoon in the market where he sold his wares. Where he saw someone who he had long given up for dead walked up to him alive and well. Where he had told her that he would not be with her. Where he had married his wife and was very happy. The look of betrayal in her eyes as she heard those words spilling from his mouth. Words that he wished he could have taken back. She had left without looking back, the words "Forgive me." from his lips unheard. He would have felt the same way if he had been in her place. He wished deeply in his heart that things were different, but alas some things could not be change and he had to deal with it now.

"Love won't you come to bed?" the voice of his wife sounded through the door. He turned to see her leaning against the door frame. He turned over the parchment as she came up to him. He did not need her to see what he was writing. She knew he was an exiled, but not about his past relation to the Lady Aeducan. Maybe if she did know, she might leave him and let him be free to pursue his love. Or maybe not.

"You're suppose to be in bed love, it's not good for the baby if you don't get enough sleep." Gorim gently tweaked her nose as he chided her gently. His wife merely smiled at him, " I couldn't sleep as I was lonely, plus you have a busy day ahead tomorrow and you're not in bed too. Something bothering you?" Gorim shook his head, "No nothing just something I got to do before I head to bed." His wife looked at the overturned parchment, "Writing to someone?" she asked as she reached out to turn it over. Gorim quickly slapped his hand over the parchment preventing her from doing so, his heart pounding. "Tis not for you eyes love. Just a letter to an old friend thought dead." Gorim tucked the letter away quickly in one of the drawers of the desk. His wife looked at him concerned. "An old friend thought dead? You must have been very happy to see him." His wife said. Gorim shook his head sadly. "I wish I could say the same for he-him. He was upset to find out that I had given up on him. That letter was to apologise and that I could no longer serve him as I once did in Orzammar. He had left rather quickly before I could explain to him."

His wife stroke his face, "It must have been very hard for you. I am sure once he cools down he will understand. Come to bed, a good nights sleep will put your worries to rest and wash your troubles away." Gorim kiss his wife's hands, "In a minute I will, I just have to seal it and I will join you." His wife left for bed leaving him to his letter. Gorim took out the letter and read through it one more time. Satisfied that it will have to do, he folded it and sealed it with a blob of wax. On the back he wrote "Lady Aeducan" before putting it away to be sent the next day.

*****Serada*****

As Serada sat at her room at the inn, she saw on the table a letter which the servants must have left there for her attention. Picking it up she examined the handwriting her name was written in. It looked familiar and brought feelings of joy mixed with sadness. She wondered who would address the letter to "Lady Aeducan" and soon realised it was Gorim's handwriting. Throwing it back on the table with anger and disgust, she could not understand why he would write a letter to her. He had declared right in front of her how he was married and happy with that hussy. She had felt herself grow cold and numb at his words and turned away when he had started to apologise. She could not, would not listen to his words any longer for fear she would break and lose her mind. Frustrated she ordered several jugs of strong mead to be brought up to her room. Maybe the alcohol will help drown out the pain she was feeling in her heart right now.

A knock on the door sounded and the servant came in carrying Several jugs of mead on a tray. She was followed behind by Oghren. "By the Gods! I never thought it would be you to order that much mead! You must have had something good happen." Oghren exclaimed but hastily said "Or something bad happened." when he saw Serada's face. Pulling up two armchairs by the table filled with jugs of mead, he sat down in one of the chairs. "Mind if I join ye? Drinking alone is never good for anyone. Come and tell ole Oghren what has upset you so." Serada sat down and poured herself a drink after motioning for the servant to go.

Taking a deep gulp of the mead, Serada did not talk until she had drank a few mugs of mead. First she talked about how happy she was to have been reunited with Gorim back at the market square. The time where the whole group had saw her talking to a dwarf which turned out to be Gorim. How she had been shattered when he had told her he was married and with a child on the way. Oghren wisely kept his mouth shut and let her talk and drank with her. She went talking about how back in Orzammar, when both of them were exiled they had made plans to meet up in Denerim. How she had kept hope in her heart that she would meet him and they would both be together finally as equals, without titles barring them. Both of them kept drinking throughout, and soon enough she was drunk and slurring her words. "Ansh he had deh cheek to send me a stuspid letter." Serada pointed over where the letter was among the jugs of mead, "Over there" she slurred. "I dun wanna read anything that worthless scum has written."

Oghren took a deep swallow of his mead before speaking. "Ah his lost it is. Drink up more! We'll get so drunk we won't even know who we are!"

Both of them continued drinking late into the night. Drowning out everything but the alcohol. Soon enough Serada was close to passing out. Oghren was still going strong. Oghren giggled at Serada and gave a loud burp before declaring himself winner of some unknow drinking contest between them. Serada merely gave a small laugh and tried to stand but was too drunk to do so. Oghren got up and helped her, surprisingly steady for a very drunk dwarf. Both of them made their way over to the bed where Oghren tucked Serada in and left noisily. Most likely to continue drinking somewhere else. Once Serada's head had touched the pillow, she passed out instantly dead to the world.

The following morning, Serada woke up with a pounding headache that felt like someone had driven a hammer into her head. With a groan she set about washing up and getting ready. Once dress and ready, Serada made for the door to join her companions for breakfast. Yet the letter on the table caught her eye. She paused, knowing that reading the letter will only bring further sorrow upon her heart. Taking the letter and tucking it away in her clothes, she decided it was best to read it when she was strong enough to face what Gorim had written to her. When that would be, she did not know. For now she had a world to save with her companions, the letter can wait.

*****The Letter*****_(For those who have a burning curiosity of what the letter might contain, here it is)_

My Lady, my heart,

Indeed I do not have the right nor any claim upon you to address you as such. But my heart has never been so light, and yet so heavy since the day I saw you walk in that market square alive and well.

I had never thought that you would have survive the slaughter at the Ostagar. When I had heard about it, my heart failed and I was truly alone in this world. What was I without my lady Aeducan? Who am I without my heart? You were dead according to the news. Furthermore I had been injured on the way to Denerim and could not be your warrior partner if you were alive.

My world was dark, despite the sun shining brightly, I could see no light. Even with my new found skills making and selling weapons which I had hoped to support you with, you were not there. My world was empty. I live each day as a soulless husk of myself. I went about my business as usual, but I could not smile. My only joy and light of my soul was gone. My heart had died with your death. Several times I had contemplated suicide to join you.

It was one night while drinking myself numb at the tavern that I met a blacksmith. He and I became friends after a large brawl with the other patrons there. We met every night to talk, and drink. His daughter came one night looking for him, and it was there I came to know my wife. It took me awhile to get over my sorrows, and she was there for me listening and giving me comfort and support. I soon fell in love with her and when I asked her to marry me she agreed and we got married soon after. Now as you know, she is with child. Never had I been so happy to hear that I was going to be a father.

It was a week later that I saw you walk in the market. So happy, and alive. I could not believe my eyes. There you were, walking, laughing with your group and the mabari hound bounding beside you happily. It was then I realised that deep down inside of me you were and have always be my heart. I had trapped myself with a wife and child to escape from the news that you were dead. I had tried to bury myself in everyday life.

I can never forget your face when you saw me. Your face lit up like the morning heart came alive with such a strong surge, it almost staggered me. You came to me like a goddess of war welcoming her long lost lover. That joyous face slowly turning to confusion as I spoke to you of my wife and coming child, which soon turn to sadness, anger and betrayal. And as you turn away, I felt my heart grew heavy. I knew then I had lost you, not to death but by my own hand. I wanted so much to take back all those words I said, wanted to turn back time and instead of marrying her, waited for you.

Now I will forever be burdened with this guilt, being married to a woman who will never know that I still love you. That if given a chance will give up everything to be with you. To hold you and comfort you. To kiss and caress. To share everything in life with you.

No matter how I wish I could leave and join you, I cannot do that to both my wife and coming child. They do not deserve to suffer for my foolishness.

Know that forever you have my heart fully and that nothing will ever take your place in it.

I will always and forever love you, my lady, my heart.

Gorim


End file.
